The Catherinette Chronicles

Inspired by Actual Events

The Catherinette Chronicles

Entries from July 2008

Klass Act

July 28th, 2008 · No Comments

Last night, Foxy, her hub cap (Cheeto Boy), 3D and I attended a little dinner party at Amber’s house. There was fantastic food, wine a plenty, and klassy dialogue. Behold a prime example of how Foxy and I klass up the joint:
We were discussing a security guard that used to work with us. Her secret [...]

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Tags: 3D · Foxy · funny · klassy

Liar, Liar, Whorepants On Fire

July 25th, 2008 · No Comments

Without further ado, I present the results of the “hypothetical” poll!
Question: Your significant other has told you that he’s slept with a certain number of people and then asks you how many people you’ve been with. How do you respond?

31% Avoid the question entirely and distract him by ripping your top off and telling him [...]

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Tags: 3D · dating

A Conversation Between You & Me

July 23rd, 2008 · No Comments

You: What’s up, Cath?
Me: Not too much. Just getting back from lunch with Foxy and MHKP.
You: Oh yeah? How was that?
Me: Awesome, I ate a pork sandwich and the waiter kept listening into our conversation?
You: Why would he do that?
Me: I don’t know. Maybe it’s because Foxy kept yelling about hookers the whole time?
You: How [...]

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Tags: Foxy · funny

Thighs & Lows

July 21st, 2008 · No Comments

Oh God, the horror. THE HORROR!! White, dimpled thighs sticking out of the bottom of a swimsuit which is straining to conceal what’s inside. The sun bounces of the pastier-than-white thighs to blind everyone within a 2 mile radius. Corneas are burned-it’s like staring straight into the sun. People will actually go blind. If they’re [...]

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Tags: 3D

Foxy Strikes Again

July 18th, 2008 · No Comments

Oh that whoring Foxy. She has done it again! You may remember some of her earlier shenanigans. Well, she’s struck again!!
Just this morning she asked to borrow a post it note. Like the sucker that I am, I assumed that she was actually going to do something work related with it. Oh how very wrong [...]

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Tags: 3D · Foxy · funny · shenanigans

Death by Strangulation

July 16th, 2008 · No Comments

There are times when I want to strangle everyone in my family. This is one of those times. Both my mother and sister are silently begging me to wrap my hands around their necks and squeeze until their faces turn purple. I might go head and do it.
I’m busy and important. I’m the type of [...]

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Tags: family · ranting and raving

Smooth Like Sandpaper

July 14th, 2008 · No Comments

This weekend marks a first for me: 3D took me home to meet his parents. We’re midway through month 2 of our whirlwind romance and meeting the family seemed like a good idea. He’s done an exceptionally good job of hiding how well his parents have done for themselves. He apparently forgot to mention that [...]

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Tags: 3D · kill me now

Super Supportive

July 11th, 2008 · No Comments

It’s finally over.
After a year and some months of being together, the hot romance between Baby Tramp and Lit’l Smokey has finally ended. Foxy and I, ever so supportive, are consoling him during these hard times.

Me: You’re such a catch. She’ll be sorry.

Foxy: Yeah. She blew a great guy.

Me: More than once.

I’ve never seen anyone [...]

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Tags: Foxy · funny

My Wobbly Bits

July 11th, 2008 · No Comments

It’s hard dragging yourself out of bed in the morning when you have a hot someone trying to convince you to stay. Still, I managed. Sure, I was 20 minutes late to work, but I’m here now-and that’s what counts. The slumber parties are working out well. The crappy part is that I have to [...]

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Tags: 3D · dating

Best Friends Forever

July 8th, 2008 · No Comments

What is the true mark of friendship? Everyone has their own idea of what friendship really means. Well let me tell you what it means to me: friendship is about being in sync and sharing things with one another.
Using this definition, Foxy and I are true friends.
You’ve all heard how women’s periods tend to sync [...]

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Tags: 3D · Foxy · gross