I’m So High Klass

So let me ask you a question. When the doctor told me that I was on “bed rest”, do you think that he meant that I couldn’t mow the lawn? Because I totally just mowed 1/2 the back lawn. In my nightgown, and I wasn’t wearing a bra. I just couldn’t turn my back on my heritage for one more minute.

Go ahead and admit that I’m one of the klassiest people that you’ve ever met. Really, just think about it. How many other people do you know that mow their lawn in a nightgown?

This is high freaking klass.

I feel like I should totally be drinking a Colt 45 and watching some Jerry Springer right now. Too bad that I can’t have any alcohol for the next 2 weeks-thanks, antibiotics. What else could I drink? Oh, maybe some red Kool-aid. That sounds good. Red Kool-aid and then Jerry Springer. And then maybe I’ll watch something with Bill Engvall in it. He’s most definitely the epitome of high klass.

I’m so proud of myself right now that I feel like I should get a tattoo of Speedy Gonzalez or the Tasmanian Devil on my right ankle. Because nothing says klass like a chick working on an office wearing nude colored stockings over a tattoo of a cartoon character. I want to be that girl.

I’m So High Klass

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